Lima, te quiero mucho

I am sitting in a McDonald´s in Lima. That´s right. For the first time in over a year and a half, I just devoured a Big Mac with 2 sides of pickles(which I had yet to find in Perú), fries and a lovely Coca-cola. I don´t know what kind of addictive substance they add to the Big Mac to make is so delicious, but I know some sort of trigger went off in my brain after tasting the first bite. ¨Aw yes, there it is!¨ We´re in Lima for our mid-service medical checks and dental exams. This is the first time in a long time that I´ve left the dentist with nothing more than a cleaning! Who knew all you had to do was floss regularly? (Answer: Every dentist I´ve ever been to who has looked at my teeth before.) I don´t know why it took so long for me to pick up that little habit. But I decided to celebrate my clean bill of health (so far so good) and my cleaner teeth with some junk food and a big soda.

I´ve got one more year of service, and it should go by relatively fast. I´m a bit nervous about Bulla leaving, but she´s got some big plans to do whale research in a lab in Olympia, Washington. Keep your fingers crossed that her interview goes well next week. I think she´s got the intership in the bag. I hope she goes to Alaska next year, too.

I finished Project Ironman/Ironwoman with my kids last week. We went to the beach at Pimentel. 13 of my 44 kids completed all the components: diaries, reading ¨The Diary of Anne Frank¨, running a 5K, doing tons of push-ups and sit-ups, going to a list of youth development classes, a doing good works. They´ve learned about self-esteem, leadership, abstinence, fidelity, condom-use, healthy dating, caring for the environment, how to start a small business, the process of going to collegeor a technical school, and so much more. I´m so very proud of them. What a journey it has been, and I can´t wait to make the program more sustainable and successful next year! The program is being recognized by Peace Corps Perú, and will hopefully be replicated by more volunteers in the future. Carolyn and I worked so very hard at creat the program, and it would be amazing to see more and more volunteers take it on.

The ¨Ama Tu Perú¨ campaign is going well. I´m hoping to get the 2 billboards made, though I´m nervous about not getting a response yet from my email to the Passion Fruit company that is paying for the billboards. We had 2 students win the competition and they have been informed, so I´m gonna do my best to follow the project through.

I´m so grateful to have this kind of opportunity to do real grassroots work. It´s amazing how much flexibility and freedom I have to create my own projects/programs. The Peace Corps gives us all the tools we need, but it is probably one of the few jobs in the world where you can do good in your own way. I wake up every morning and get to decide how best to use it. What a blessing this experience has been.

Next year will definitely be different. Sarah Bulla won´t be here, and neither will Carolyn. Carol is headed to Lima to lead the environment program next year. I´m excited for her, and have realized how much I love Lima. For me, Lima means food, food, food. So much good food that I miss so much. I´m getting sushi tonight! Heck yes!

Courts for Kids: Anyone insterested in helping some kids get a court?

I submitted an application for this non-governmental organization called Courts for Kids that pays for ball courts constructed by school groups, service clubs, church groups, sports teams, sorority and frat groups, adult groups, etc who raise money and go to Perú to build them in rural communities.

My community, Corral de Arena, has applied. We just got word that our application is good, however, there is a waiting list of like 26 courts before mine. So the likelihood that we would have a group come before my Peace Corps service ends in November 2012 is not very high. Do any of you have an interest (or know anyone who might) to use a group of 12 people or more to raise funds to build a cement soccer court and come to Perú to make it while staying in my community?

If so, check out this website and get back to me. http://www.courtsforkids.org/ I would like to find a group of people while I am in the States for Christmas. I think the project itself is gonna cost around 35 thousand dollars and I don´t know yet about trasportation costs, but will be updating this blog post accordingly.

If not, don´t worry. I will have other projects (like books, clothes and educational toys) I will be asking for help to finance in the future as well.

Unstoppable Wave (One more year of Peace Corps to go.)

This week, Perú 16 is celebrating our one year anniversary of Peace Corps service. That means I have been in my community about 9 months. Thinking about all that I hoped to accomplish by the end of my 2 years is a bit daunting….When will I ever find the time? And where are all those people I thought would be eager to jump into projects with me? Why are most of the people I still consider good friends in Perú actually fellow volunteers rather than Peruvians? There have been a lot of accomplishments in this short time, many of which have to do with working in the school and our two radio programs. But there is this poster in my room with a list of large projects I want to see through that I don´t know how to tackle. And already I can see certain dreams have slipped away.
It is also an interesting place to be, because we volunteers of Perú 16 are getting ready to say goodbye to the group that came a year before us (Perú 14). I am beginning to wonder what I will do for work in a year. At the same time that I need to buckle down and get rolling on bigger projects, I need to begin to figure out what is next. How can I use these two years to find the perfect job back in the States (you know, those kinds of jobs that come with a salary)?
I have dreamed since I was 16 about going to seminary, and that is still very far away. But I am wondering how the heck I would come up with 80 grand to pay for that, not to mention the 30 grand I already have to pay back for the bachelor degree I paid for with student loans. Yikes. And what would my ragamuffin ministry look like anyway? Do I really have anything to offer the Christian community in terms of leadership and a message?
And with all of these questions and possible moments for me to screw up God´s big plan, I keep coming back to this moment I had at the beach in Lima in March. I had just really put myself in a vulnerable position, telling someone that I really, really cared for them. And the feelings at the time weren´t returned. I felt embarrassed for having been so open, hoping I hadn´t ruined a friendship. I was disappointed in myself for not waiting on God´s signal, like I had jumped the gun. I wanted to be so much more disciplined, waiting for some waterfall or sign in the sky first. So I was fretting about having said how I felt. At the same time, I really thought this person was missing out on something that could be beautiful and I didn´t understand why they didn´t see what I saw.
I woke up and went for a run with all of these thoughts rotating within my head. I wanted to run ´til I didn´t feel upset anymore. So I ran from my hostel down the road and down the hill to the beach. Winded and down on myself, I came to this rocky pathway out into the ocean. And I walked out with so many frustrations, disappointments and apologies that I kept expressing intensely in my prayers. ¨I am sorry God. I am sorry for not waiting on You to give me some extravagant signal. I am sorry I am not more disciplined…¨ And at that moment, this wave crashed so incredibly hard against the rocks beside me that it shook and jumbled every thought I had been stressing over. And I heard God say very forcefully to me, ¨you underestimate me¨.
I realized that I was giving myself way too much credit - that I could actually screw up God´s grand plan. And I sat there for a long time just listening to God comfort me, telling it to me over and over again. You underestimate me. You underestimate me. You underestimate me. This God that not only made the waves that I couldn´t stop with all my force, if I willed it with all my heart and soul, made every being, this Earth, the Universe. And little Terrace won´t be able to get in the way of that. How comforting that was then, and still is today with all of these uncertainties and pressures.
I´m ready and I´m listening. I am bound to mess something up. But I take comfort in knowing that God will move me and shape me. We´ll mess it up. But we´ve been chosen all the same. God moves and works within us like an unstoppable wave.

if you´ve been thinking about sending me something

Please forgive this kinda selfish blog entry/wish list. I know there are many people who have been wondering what kinds of things I could use if they sent something. So here is an answer for those of you who read the blog:

Ok, faithful readers, I have a little request for those who might have a good Christian book laying around the house. I´m running low on Christian commentary or devotion-type reading material. Volunteers are really great about swapping books, but this is a subject area that is lacking. So, if there were any of you planning to send me something at some point anyway, know that I would love to get my hands on something thought-provoking related to the big JC. I´m also lacking in the Christian music department, don´t really know what new stuff has been coming out lately. Sweet mixed cd? Maybe I could send you a bracelet or necklace made from one of our local Peruvian hippies.

I also want to know what people are reading right now in terms of Chrisian writers. What have you been reading?

If you don´t have any Christian books and want to send something, you can never go wrong with food, coffee or spices from the U.S. Nuts, chili/soup mixes, beef jerky, seasoned salt.


Terrace Hill--Cuerpo de Paz
Casilla Postal 208
Oficina Serpost S.A.
Chiclayo, Peru

Things are going pretty well with work. School has started back from break today, and I hope to teach a lot of classes the next two weeks to catch up on lost time. We still have the two radio shows in Olmos, but we´re changing the AM station to be an informal show called ¨Cafe con Las Chicas¨ aka ¨Coffee with the Girls¨. Caroline and I won a little bit of grant money to buy books and pay for kids of project Ironman/Ironwoman to go on a trip at the end of the school year if they complete the program. Yay!!!!

Environmental volunteers from Perú 14 are wrapping up their last few months before heading back to the States. I´m going to miss them. Caroline will be sticking around and working in Lima, leading all the environment volunteers. I´m so excited to be going home for Christmas. So plan to be in Lubbock, Texas between December 23rd and January 2nd if possible.

Camps of thought on that Jesus dude.

Happy Peruvian Independence Day to everyone reading from the United States. We had a new president installed yesterday. Lisa, Sarah and I got together to celebrate and watch Ollanta make his first speech in office. We ate some popcorn, some paneton (my favorite fruit cake), coffee and cold beer.

We also have been watching the documentary ¨Jesus Camp¨. It´s been a few years since I´ve seen that film, and I forget how much it reminds me of my evangelical childhood. Keep in mind, that our Southern Baptist church was not that crazy, but they did teach us that we are in a spiritual war with the devil, that there is a darkness in people who aren´t Christians. You´re either saved and going to heaven or you´re headed to hell. Christians better tell everyone they know, even if it makes them uncomfortable. Gays are sick, no make that filthy. People who have abortions are murderers. There is a black and white way to look at sin. God does have a clear political party. There are people who have these answers, who have been sensible and humble enough to pick up their cross and follow in the right path. The rest are lost, empty, and don´t realize what they are missing out on.

I used to think all of those things…because I was taught by adults that I respected. Sometimes they were said outright, and other times they were just known by all the members and suggested more subtly. But I remember my arrogance in having known the way, my pity for the lost. Oh, how I feared for their future beyond the grave. I was so afraid of God, afraid of disappointing God, afraid of disappointing my earthly family of God. Fear. Fear. Fear. And still, with all of those terrible memories, those faulty pieces in my logic, I also remember a deep and moving love for God that is more true and good than anything I´ve ever known. When I was 6, there was a short time when our family didn´t go to church. And I remember lining up chairs in our playhouse to make pews for my little sister, Logi, and preaching from one verse in the book of Matthew. I can still remember that overpowering feeling of love and wisdom that was within me even at that age. The Holy Spirit was real and moved with a force that was from far beyond me.

My past with Christianity and the church have been a mixture of these two kinds of feelings: feelings of shame and judgment, and feelings of liberation, love and truth. One of my favorite professors in college told me there are people who have been damaged by their conservative Christian upbringings and leave their faith behind altogether, and then there are those who stick it out and wrestle with their faith, and come out stronger for it. I really believe that, if we really are changed by the story of Jesus, that we become part of the Church in the biggest sense of the word. With all of its current and historical problems, we are made a part to complete one another. We help one another to think and evaluate what we´re really saying, how we´re really living.

And as important church, the community of Jesus lovers, is, I´m seeing that God has given me this time in Perú to heal from those painful experiences that I hold with the church and see ¨non-Christians¨ differently. I think I´ve been taken away from it for awhile to be brought back with a better understanding of who I am and how I can help. More importantly, I´m learning to be a person after God´s own heart, rather than after the heart of Christians. I care so deeply about the approval of certain people that I consider to be very close to God. And I´m seeing that, even when I feel ok with something in my God time, I still ache for the approval of those people.

And somehow, getting me to Perú and far away from my Christian community is giving me the freedom to figure out what I want my life to look like, what I really believe free of judgment. I can´t say that it´s led to any amazing revelation. I have nothing stunning to share with you all. At the moment, what I understand is pretty basic. That is that I don´t have the answers, and all I want to do is be one after God´s own heart. I want to figure out how feed the hungry, clothe the naked, care for the sick, visit the imprisoned. Truth be told, I´m not literally doing any of that, but I think Shane Claiborne was right to say that the point is FINDING A NEED AND FILLING IT. I think it is there that we really find ourselves as part of Christ´s body.

There´s No Place Like Olmos

I wouldn´t say that I necessarily see Corral de Arena or Olmos as home, but I´ve got a good group of friends and community here. I don´t know that I´ve explained this, but I live in the district of Olmos (approximately 10,000 people), in the town or caserio called Corral de Arena (pop. around 700). There is hardly anything in my town, except for a restaurant that no one really goes to. So Olmos is where I go for pretty much anything we need. For anything more, I have to go to the capital of Lambayeque, which is Chiclayo. We currently have 7 volunteers living in Olmos, 5 girls and 2 guys. All but one of the guys are environment volunteers. So, as you may imagine, the girls have bonded really well, and we end up doing a lot of work together. We´ve got something special in Olmos that is different from most Peace Corps experiences, because we are such a tight cluster. It gives us an opportunity to tackle more than we might have time for alone, and using everyone´s creativity and ideas makes our projects more sucessful. Our big project together is our Environmental radio shows which we are now doing twice a week, once on AM and once on FM. The FM one is more formal, while the AM station gives us a chance to relax and be more conversational. For example, on AM this week, I´m gonna talk about rap and raggeton music.

Let me introduce the Olmos crew. For the boys, we have Speare and John. Speare lives in Olmos. We don´t see him very often, but we like to tease him for working out so much. John lives in Ñuape and is doing good work. John is very outdoorsy, a very knowledgeable bird enthusiast with a quirky list of interest including writing poetry in Spanish about food. There is Carolyn who lives in Sincape. Carolyn is always upbeat, happy, ready to take on new projects. She´s also my go-to girl for having a beer, singing and dancing around. Next we have Sara Lev. in La Estancia which is within an hour´s walk from my site. We´re from the same group and trained together. Sara Lev. is who we called the most beautiful girl in Perú (think sexy librarian). For some reason, there is no one more beautiful than ¨the Sarita¨ to Peruvian men. When she visits our sites, men will ask about her from then on. It´s kinda ridiculous. Sara is the analytical one in the group. On the Chachapoyas trip, she earned the name ¨Ball-buster Sara¨, shortened later to just ¨Busty¨, because she doesn´t take shit and is often the one to speak up and get tough. Sara was the Queen of Recycling yesterday in the parade, sporting a dress made of paper. We also have Miss Lisa, who used to live in my site but is now living and working in Olmos. She´s working with an animal refuge, mostly for animals sold on the black market and also the Pava Aliblanca, a native bird that is close to extinction. Lisa coordinates our radio shows and the funding. She´s gotten me into Glee, which has inspired many a dance/sing party at the house of the Bulla (pronounced Buya).

Ok, so Bulla has to have her own paragraph. A very special person in my life, Bulla got her name when she first entered Peace Corps nearly 2 1/2 years ago. She was in her Spanish class, being very loud as she always is, cackling and having a good time, and another Spanish teacher who could hear her from far away muttered ¨bulla¨ under his breath, which means ¨ruckus¨. Ever since Sarah has been Sarah Bulla. After 2 years living in the Andes mountains of Yauyos, Lima, she was offered the third year position in Olmos to manage 20 schools that are a part of the Environmental Education Network of Olmos, started by another volunteer whose name was also Sara. Bulla´s house in where all the other volunteers go for internet, good food prepared in a nice kitchen, and a break from the stresses of site. Bulla is loud and funny, always dancing around and keeping us laughing. I´m not sure I´ve met anyone so happy. When the rest of us are done for the day, she´ll stop and talk to every Peruvian who tries to get her attention in the street. Bulla is helping me to love the Environment more. I have a love for the Earth in the sense that I want to do work to protect it: environemental education, trash campagns. But Bulla loves hiking, camping, kayaking, bird watching, rolling around in the grass (accidentally with dog poop once or twice). Naturally, she was the Queen of the Environment in the parade yesterday. We rode on a cart covered in palm branches and banana leaves, pulled by a donkey and a lovely old man.


This past week was the Festival del Limón, the Festival of the Lime. Olmos is known for growing those tiny limes you might buy for your ¨cold ber¨. We had two floats in the parade, one for the environment and one for recycling, covered in things made of recycled materials like plastic bottles turned into flowers. The announcer made a mistake in announcing us: ¨and here we have the Queen of the Environment with her gringo...correction, with her gringa¨. A funny way to put it, hope that doesn´t get us into trouble later. I think it was fine. I was supposed to be her chofer, but the donkey was spooked by all the crowds, so I just rode on the float anyway. For the festival, we also did the puppet show with Don Cochinon - a trash-loving, sing-happy character who wants to dirty the whole planet. The kids always love that show, and it carries a good message about not littering and the importance of recycling. During the 2 week festival, we also put on games, kiosks, and an environmental quiz for students to win prizes. We also participated in a Guinness World Record, eating the largest plate of goat ever! Really, it was more like 15,000 plates and 500 goats. Yum yum. The cast of the Peruvian tv show/telenovela ¨Hay Fondo Al Sitio¨ came out and performed a concert, really only Joel sang while the rest danced around. I was so happy for the people, that show is something they own as a country and makes them proud. Seeing them in person was huge. And Nicolas is so much better looking in person. That´s one good looking man.

I´m stoked to be living here with this group of volunteers, sad that Carolyn will be leaving us for sure and hoping we can keep Bulla and Lisa around for one more year. We´ve got something incredible going on here.

8:05

When I first got to site, I put an alarm on my watch to go off at 8:05 AM everyday to wake me up. After training, it was really nice to get to sleep in. 8:05 was usually the time when volunteers were beginning to gather at the training center. We'd take turns making coffee for the rest of the volunteers. And slowly a group of us would form a circle and watch it brew. But, when I got to site, I bought a really comfortable mattress and loved to sleep til 7:30 or 8. I put the alarm as a back up to me waking up naturally. To Peruvians, waking up at 8 AM is late. By that time, my host mom has usually swept the cement and dirt patio and kitchen areas. She's cooked breakfast and is on to more chores. I was also struggling with a depression when I first got to site. Life in the campo is difficult, really boring a lonely a lot of the time. So sleeping became a lovely escape in addition to feeling good.

But I felt like I needed a change. I started training for the marathon, and that got me out of bed earlier. It's too hot to run past 8 AM. I'd wake up around 6:30 or 7. The runs became more and more energizing and rewarding. I'd end them dancing, singing, praying. And slowly, life got better and better. I'd wake up earlier, but the alarm would still go off. I began to gauge how my life was going by what I was doing at 8:05, and now it's a thing. It's a way to check on myself. Sure, sometimes I'm sleeping (and that is a wonderful thing), but I'm delighted by the variety of activities taking place at 8:05. Cooking breakfast with a special someone. Singing. Reading. Stretching. Laughing at my little brother Anderson shaking his booty and getting in trouble at breakfast time, that sweet face, that boisterous cackle that makes me want to hold him tight and tell him to never change.

Sunday, Carolyn, Dani and I were 2 hours into our 15 mile run in the Bosque do Pomac (part of the dry forest) when my alarm went off. I was overwhelmed by the beauty, in pain and hoping I'd make it back to the town. We still have 50 minutes to go. Dani had taken us down a shadier route, but it meant running in sand - good training for what Pacasmayo will be like. From about 50 yards in front of me, two white horses, one fully-grown and one foal, came galloping across our running path with their manes were flowing, kicking the sand as they left our sight again. "I'm really living", I thought to myself. And 8:05 often has that effect on me. It's a moment for gratitude. Diarrhea and my weekly sicknesses aside, life is good. I look forward to figuring out ways to make 8:05 even better!